Jon S, Freehold, New Jersey USA

What's the obstacle that would have prevented you from investing in coaching?

I think the obstacle I had to overcome was realizing that I needed it. I think that was the biggest thing for me, was understanding that I was struggling in a few different aspects of my life and wasn't happy with where I was with my relationships. I finally realized that I needed some outside perspective and that's what really pushed me to look for coaching.

What did you find as a result of investing in coaching with me?

I discovered that having someone who you can be completely open and honest with that has no judgments towards you, and is only there to offer you help and advice is very freeing. It allows you to explore aspects of your life and relationships and be completely honest with yourself in ways that I didn't think would be possible with another person. So really, I think the biggest piece for me was being able to talk to you about things that I've never talked to anybody else about. Being honest with you made me be honest with myself. For too long, I either lied to myself or was just intentionally in denial and getting it out and speaking to you about it allowed me to address my deepest issues.

What specific feature did you like most about my coaching process?

The fact that you never let me get away with it. What I mean by that is you always held me to account, which is probably one of the most important things that I needed. When I started with coaching, I was I was the 'get out easy, do it, the quickest way', whatever would get me to my desired outcome, whether it was healthy for me or not. But you made me look at it and say, "Are you sure this is what you want? Are you sure this is what's best for you?" Holding me to that, keeping me accountable, and keeping me in integrity was huge for me.

What were three other benefits from working with me?

I think I saved my marriage. I think the relationship that I have now today with my wife is a 180 from what it was six or eight months ago. I was lying and hiding and living a double life in a lot of ways. Working with you allowed me to stop doing that and live in reality. The people closest to us know the truth, whether we want to admit it or not. And I think that's what was happening. My wife knew there were things that I was hiding. I stopped doing that and I was able to really rebuild that relationship.

Another thing that was that you made me realize my self worth in a lot of ways, not only in personal relationships, but in my my business and career life. I hold myself to a higher standard because I believe that I'm worth a lot more than I ever thought I was.

And the number one thing is you gave me my integrity back. For me, that is the biggest thing. The lying and the hiding and all those things are in the past for me. That's not something that is part of my personality anymore. Whereas before my gut reaction was to lie about things, stupid things just to make myself look a little bit better, for no reason, when the truth was just fine.

Would you recommend someone else work with me? Why?

I absolutely would. Yes, for sure. I think that we're living in a unique time, where a lot of men are struggling to find their place in life. And I think to have someone like you that is able to bring them to reality of what things actually are and allow them to build themselves up, to teach them how they can be confident again and be - I don't want to say be real men, but in a certain sense, it kind of is - to be able to live in integrity, be able to live in a way that they are living up to their potential. And I don't think that's common anymore. I think it's difficult to live to your potential. And I think that's one of the things that I would tell people. If they asked me, I would say, "Go, get coaching because you'll reach your potential.”

Is there anything else you'd like to add?

I don't want to say I got my life back because I have something better than what I had before. I feel like I'm reaching my potential. I'm living in a way where I'm proud of myself that I'm able to be okay with shortcomings and be okay with things that may not go the way that I had hoped, and be able to move past them and know that things will be okay and that I will grow and progress from those issues or those those setbacks or failures or whatever they are. It's not world-ending. And one of the things that I used to struggle a lot with was any sign of failure, or any sign of of decline, or any sign of difficulty is just like, "Well, you just kind of throw your hands up and give up and you spiral and nothing's ever going to work out." Now, it's, "You meet challenges head on, you persevere, you know that things may seem really, really difficult and scary and terrible right now, but they won't always be that way." And I think that's one of the things you taught me is that this isn't permanent. The terribleness and sadness and all this. It's not permanent. Eventually it will be gone. It may take a while, but it will eventually go away and things will get better.